and then she said. . .

I’m at coffee shop finishing up some work when a young lady sits at the table next to me. I do the typical quick glance to see if she’s worth a second look. 4 glances at her pretty face later I decided I have already answered my own question. I dive back into my computer screen and finish up the project that was duly stopped for a worthwhile cause. A few minutes later I see a side-to-side motion in my peripheral vision. It’s the cutie pie across from me. She’s trying to get my attention.

I’m so sorry to bother you but I wanted to know if it would be too much to ask if I could check my e-mail on your computer. It’s really important.”

Sure I was just about to finish up anyway.”

Her face lights up and she scoots her chair beside mine.

Thank you so much. Nobody else around here seemed very friendly.”

I look around and the place is swarming with young men and woman. Practically everybody has a smile on their face.

She hops on the keyboard and proceeds to check her mail. As she’s surfing we go through the typical pleasantries. My name’s this, I do that, I live here, blah, blah, blah. We small talked for about 10 minutes. She seemed like a very nice girl. Then out of the blue she hits me with “it”. She goes through the same old song and dance that every cute girl gives every guy.

Most of my friends are guys. I don’t hang out with girls. Girls are just too hard to get along with.”

All I could think is, “Oh boy, here we go again…

Ok… I’m curious. Do women really think it’s a turn on for a guy to find out that you have an entire stable of other men that you spend the majority of your time with?!? Now granted, I do believe in the possibility of plutonic relationships between men and woman. I personally have a few that are absolutely exceptional; however, I find it very difficult to believe that one woman with a shit ton of male friends can be plutonic in every situation.

Now whether or not this particular young lady is sleeping with the majority of her male friends is a mystery to me, but I’m pretty certain a line has been crossed on multiple occasions before. I love my female plutonic friends. I love them to death! However, have I slept with “some” of said plutonic friends? Abso-fucking-lutely! It’s just the nature of the male/female relationship. We’re hard wired to be attracted to one another. It’s not a social, racial, financial, east coast, west coast thing. It’s just a human thing. My issue isn’t with the friendship, it’s with the assumption that you think I’m a fool. Many women pull this one trick pony out of their hat as a way to justify and clear the palette for future actions concerning said male friends. For me it’s an immediate red flag.

I can’t even begin to count the number of times I’ve hung out with a female friend, that I’ve either had relations with or am currently having relations with, and have been introduced to their significant other. I typically just sit there with a shit eating grin on my face and give the appropriate levels of dap and conversation to the other lad.

After the meet-and-greet is over with, my female friend pulls the guy off to the side and whispers the usual appeasement, “See, I told you he was cool. You have nothing to worry about”.

(cue laugh track)

My other issue with the whole “I can’t hang around girls” bullshit, is the social factor. How are we supposed to communicate properly if you’re incapable of conveying basic dialogue with someone of the same gender? It’s almost as bad as black people that hate other black people, or Christians that hate other Christians. I don’t understand how you can hate what you are! If everybody else in that particular sub group can get along, why can’t you? It seems pretty obvious that the problem doesn’t reside in the group, but in you. I’m certain that every girl who fits this category has some reason why their story should be exempt from this broadstroke of generalization. Everybody wants to be the exception to the rule but the problem with that is… you’re not.

I think all of you female-on-female haters need to take a long deep look in the mirror and see what the hell is wrong with you. Sure not every woman is going to love you and you’re certainly not going to love every other woman, but to proclaim loudly that you’re incapable of a basic human interface with someone because they share the same plumbing as you is completely silly.

Get over your ego and go make some damn friends.


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2 Responses to “and then she said. . .”

  1. Diggems Says:

    Here, here to that. Well put. I think my generation, (generation x) is redefining the nature of relationships and dating. It seems to me that as women become more empowered the more they are also picking up tendencies that male’s typically have. I for one see nothing wrong with it. I just don’t like being played for the sucka. I’m a firm believer in what’s good for the goose is also good for the gander. All I’m saying is game recognizes game. Casual dating/sex is just something that’s going to be a part of our culture regardless of you liking it or not.

  2. Sabrinia Says:

    Although I agree with you completely, there is a small point that I would like to highlight. Women, as a whole (complete generalization), tend to be catty bitches. Sure, we have our tender moments, but you put a group of us together and inevitably there WILL be conflict. This stems from one basic principle- there is a subsect of women who think like men. And by this I mean, we have a no bullshit policy and will call you on it. The majorit of women are offended by this. You see, women have been raised to be polite and nice and then talk about you behind your back. I cannot stand this behaviour. So as a general rule, I like hanging out with my male counterparts and avoid the BS.

    BUT, having said this, there have been many times that the “platonic” line has been crossed…and will be crossed again. We tell boys that line of “See, I told you he was cool. You have nothing to worry about”, not for your sake, but for our own. As much as we are lying to you, we are lying to ourselves. We hate to believe that we are susceptible to such basic carnal craving and desire. Because as sophisticated as we women like to think we are, deep down we know we cannot combat the forces of biology. I just wished we lived in a society that didnt chastize us for it!

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