Don’t Mind Him, He’s Just an Actor

evilmonkeybuisnesssuitAs an aspiring actor, I pay close attention to the interviews my fellow thespians take part in. It’s always good to know what the successful people in your industry have to say, mainly because it aids in the process of creating and seperating yourself from this mad mix of competition.

Lately, I’ve noticed that more and more successful people in the movie business have grown far too comfortable in their own little worlds. The problem with that is when said individuals decide to walk off the edge of rational thinking and expect the rest of the world to understand their perilous journey down “Alice’s rabbit hole” (take Tom Cruise’s Oprah Winfrey couch jumping episode for example). Well I for one refuse.

Where in the world is Joaquin?
So far this year, we’ve had three separate incidents where successful actors have totally lost their shit in plain view of the public’s eye. First up is Joaquin Phoenix’s interview with David Letterman.

Joaquin, for some reason, felt that dressing like a hillbilly’s lawyer was a smart move. Then, he acts like a heroin addict fresh off the needle during his interview. He even went as far as to put his gum under Letterman’s desk. The final piece to his downward spiral was an attempt to persuade the rest of the viewing audience that he was retiring from acting to pursue… a rapping career?!?

Whatever the hell he’s smoking, please share some with me! I need something to convince me, and the rest of the world, that I’d make a great NASCAR driver…

Christian Fail
Our second moron up to bat is Christian Bale. Let us not forget that he played a homicidal maniac pretty convincingly in American Psycho. At least, I’m sure that’s what the Director of Photography was thinking when Bale went ape shit on his ass.

Bale not only screamed on the poor man in front of the entire stage crew for adjusting a light while he was performing, but also threatened to beat the hell out of him and walk off set. Bale, being not of sound mind, forgot that he was still mic’d and the whole fiasco hit the web.

Later on, Bale tried to blame the misconduct on his inability to separate himself from the character that he was playing at the time. Fortunately for Bale, he didn’t “play tough” in front of somebody that would have happily “pulled his card”.

I for one would have slapped the shit out of him for screaming at me like that, and then, just to drive the point home, would have made him sign an autograph for my mother. But that’s just Diggems… That’s just how I roll! (Wiggy… wiggy… yeaaahhhh!)

Billy Bob
Finally Billy Bob Thornton. Forget the fact that he’s a movie star… and a pretty good one at that. His name alone should make you question anything that comes out of his mouth. Anyone that willingly walks into public with a name like Billy Bob couldn’t possibly be working with a full deck of cards.

Before moving to California, I lived in the south for many years; therefore, I’ve had the opportunity to meet a few people named Billy Bob, and every one of them had about as much sense in the head as they had teeth in their mouth, but I digress.

Billy Bob and his band “The Boxmasters” went on a Canadian radio station and gave an interview. Actually let me rephrase that, the rest of the band gave a good interview; answering question and letting the world know who they were. Billy Bob sat there, probably stoned out of his gourd, acting a complete fool. He refused to answer questions, rambled on about complete bullshit, and still found time to insult every Canadian listening to the radio at the time. I’m not even Canadian and I was pissed. The poor guy giving the interview just had to go along with the whole thing.

It’s about time to knock some of these actors off of the pedestals we’ve placed them on. It’s not good for the rest of the species to allow d*ck holes like these to say, and do, what they want in public without consequences. If anyone else were in those same circumstances, you can bet your sweet ass that a reckoning would have occurred. It’s only going to be a matter of time before one of these primadonna’s pisses off the wrong person, then sweet justice will prevail!

In fact, I’m gonna tell you like a friend told me, “I wish a ni**a would.”  (Yiggy… yiggy… yeeeaaahhhhh!)


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One Response to “Don’t Mind Him, He’s Just an Actor”

  1. Peggy Sue Says:

    2 much attention is given to these people. I can’t lie because i’m guilty. I watch E!, TMZ, Entertainment Tonight… you name it. It is interesting, but I agree that some of these actor/actresses let it go to their head.

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